my heart laid bare

Heavenly Father,
I can't seem to be all that I want to be, but I think I can at least be honest. Lord, I am confused. I can't seem to reconcile eternity with the temporal, the past with the future. My mind is too finite and simple. All I want to do is take a nap- rest my body and release my mind to the escape of dreams.
My puppy, for whom I thank you, is curled up next to me, and I envy her simplicity. She is so content to be who you made her. Why am I not content to be who I am? Is it because I am so flawed? Lord, why would you make people you knew would sin and bring so much pain into the world? Why would you, a loving God, create an angel that would turn from you and bring evil into existance? Pastor Angel showed us verses that lead us to conclude that you do all things for the glory of your name. All things. Even this, Lord? How could this possibly bring you glory? How could this possibly be love? Is it that I don't understand glory or love? If you are who you say you are, and I believe you are, then I must not understand love or glory as they truly are, as you understand them. Will I ever while I'm living? Could you, would you, make me to know? Almighty God, I want to see your glory. You call me your child, so please, I ask you as my heavenly Father, show me your glory! Show me as you showed Moses on the mount! Make my face radiant with it.

Lord, I want to know you. Sometimes it is so hard for me to separate you from your works. Lord, help me to know YOU. Help me to know you as I would a friend. Spend time with me, Jesus, just the two of us. Tell me about yourself. Let me gaze into the depths of your heart. Tell me what's on your mind. Confide in me as you would a friend. Lord, you called Abaham your friend, won't you please call me your friend, too?